No Security Deposit Required!

Posted in News on March 23, 2009 by phillysquirrel

“I won’t negotiate rent!” Famous words spoken by The Tsar.  But he WILL let you rent without paying a security deposit! Have a peek at the following hot Stolker rental propositions:

As you can see, Deposit = Zero $$

Also, what about utilities? Are they included in the rent?   Of  COURSE they are!  I suppose Ms. S**** just forgot to mention that electricity is NOT included in the rent.  A small detail that you will dismiss once you see these beautiful and modern rental properties.  Or perhaps after seeing some other assets that she can show you.  The electric bill (see the previous post) can be a significant dollar amount on top of the rent.  By implicitly stating that “utilities are included”  I fear that Ms. S**** is being less than truthful to prospective clients (I think she calls them clients).

All of this is taking place in a rental market that is so bad for landlords they are giving one or two months free rent in order to fill their properties!  But not Tsar Stolker!

Maybe Tsar Stolker is slowly realizing that the rental market is in the hands of the serfs, so he is willing to cut a few deals.  But as far as rent,  “No Negotiation  – never!”

Still doing a countdown until I’m out of here.


Electric Bill Overcharge!

Posted in Screw-isms on March 21, 2009 by phillysquirrel

How often have you looked at your electric bill?   You know, it’s a line item on the rent invoice we get each month…from the accounting firm of Ratters, Lynch’em and Co.   Doesn’t it seem that your electric bill is a bit…well, on the HIGH side?  News Flash!  It is! Don’t these numbers seem random? The greater question is this:  why won’t Tsar Stolker reveal how our electric bills are calculated? Oh yes, sorry-  serfs don’t need to know these details.  All the serfs need to do is pay up!  And we are paying more than we should at Juniper East.   Back to my original question:  why can’t we see how our electric bill is calculated? The answer in part may be this:  are  we subsidizing the electric usage of the Twin Princesses? They live here rent-free and perhaps electric bill-free as well.  And they love to make their electric meters spin!  Do you know how much it costs to run a hot tub 24 hours per day, year round?    Hot tubs are just the start;   remember the bathroom remodeling that the Twin Princesses required?  Yes!  Spas suck energy too.  So, for a start, the cost of subsidizing the Twin Princesses’ energy usage may be on our backs.  But wait!  There’s more!  What else could be factored into our electric bills?  Surely just energy cost cannot make these bills so high!  Is creative accounting happening here?  Can this account for the random amounts we are billed for electric each month?  We will never know what hidden charges are added to our electric bills and that is the crux of the matter.  That is why we will never see the calculation used to determine our electric bills.  Is this a surprise to anyone living at Juniper East?  We would have better odds at a casino where all the games are rigged in favor of the house.

Counting the days, hours, minutes, and seconds until escape!

Environmentally UNconscious!

Posted in News on March 10, 2009 by phillysquirrel

How dumb do they think we are?  They tell us all about how they are going to start recycling to make us think they are environmentally conscious.  Then they go out and buy at least SIX CASES of bottled water!  And this is BEFORE they start offering recycling, so every one of those 144 bottles is going to a LANDFILL.  Everyone knows it takes a lot of crude oil to make the bottles and it takes 1,000 years for a bottle to decay in a landfill.  Any website can tell you that like:

But there they go, spending the money we pay in rent to buy the bottles by the case.  What’s the matter?  Didn’t they pay the bill for the water cooler delivery either, so they’re left high and dry?  And we all know that they’re just too good to drink tap water!Water, water, everywhereSorry for the less-than-perfect photo, but it was taken through glass.

No Fire Insurance at Juniper East!

Posted in News on February 25, 2009 by phillysquirrel

This is great.  We have it on good authority ( a dear departed employee and loyal blog reader )  that the Tsar let his fire insurance policy for Juniper East lapse for an entire week! Apparently this happened in late December ’08  or early January this year.  The reason?  Non-payment of his insurance bill! So, for over a week Juniper East had NO fire insurance.  Just what would have happened if a fire had occurred? This is the damn truth as to the consequences-  our personal rental insurance would have been deemed INVALID! You see, our personal rental insurance requires the landlord to have a valid insurance policy for the dwelling.  Now, suppose a fire had occurred during this unfortunate lapse of payment by the Tsar.  Well, he is out the funds to rebuild Juniper East, but more importantly, our personal policies would not pay for our losses. Remember the questions you were asked when you applied for rental insurance?  Does the question, “does your landlord have a comprehensive fire insurance policy?” ?  Yep, that’s the killer question.  So, because Tsar Stolker was too cheap or incompetent to pay his fire insurance policy on time, we would have been royally screwed!  Think that a fire is unlikely? Did you see the pile of burned crap out on the sidewalk in front of that house, about 1/2 a block up Lombard?  That’s from the FIRE that occurred in that very house last Saturday.

This lapse in fire insurance was discovered by accident, and then only “reported” because a former employee thought it showed an abysmal lack of responsibility on the part of Tsar Stolker toward the tenants and reported it to this blog.  What else has Ol’ Man Stolker done that will affect us personally?  We don’t know, do we? And that, fellow tenants, bothers me a great deal.  Doesn’t it make you wonder as well? Counting the days ’til I’m out of this place!

PS By the way, there WAS a fire at Juniper East in the recent past that caused significant damage- have a look here:

Of special interest:  the part of the article where Stolker lies about how much fire damage occurred…

“No negotiation!”

Posted in Screw-isms on February 23, 2009 by phillysquirrel

Well, the Tzar has spoken through his mouthpiece- and quite a piece she is, but that is off topic.  Tzar Stolker refuses to negotiate ANY rent decreases. If you have a look on Craigs List, you will see that incoming tenants at Juniper East are being offered lower rates than we currently are paying (for similar apartments).  And yet, the bastard refuses to negotiate with current tenants!  I guess the Twin Princesses are costing him more than he expected.  He says that our current rents are fair market value- but what fantasy market is he talking about?  With several of the floors of Juniper East soon to be empty of tenants, he still remains the recalcitrant, greedy, SOB  that we all know.  This tenant will not be renewing a lease at Juniper East.  

The question becomes, are there any more of us not planning to renew? 

Well, is it?

Posted in News on February 16, 2009 by phillysquirrel

forsaleNeed I say more?

The Current Climate

Posted in News on February 14, 2009 by phillysquirrel

Lease Renewal Time…or as Tsar Stolker says, “This is the busy season!”.  I’ve added two new posts, the first distinctly inflammatory and the second of more somber tenor.  Both are important and both are a call to WAKE UP!  So, please read at your leisure but take action promptly.  Your wallet will suffer if you stay complacent.